alternate answer
Posted: Sun Oct 28, 2007 2:14 amthis has to be the longest blog I ever have or ever will write.
my ethics teacher asked us on a test recently to tell him a life shaping event that defines us and the ethics we use today. unfortunately I didn't have enough courage or words to answer the question with what I want to tell him, but I still feel like I have to tell people how I wanted to answer this question it would have gone something like this...
6) give me an example of a life shaping event that helped define who you are and your ethics:
my name is Holly Andrew but you can call me rain, I'm 19 years old and I live in a small town in Florida.I'm a follower of Christ, a musician,an artist of sorts, an animal lover, and a recovering cutter/drug addict.
people say that Nostradamus screwed up when he predicted the end of the world would be on the eve of the year 2000. I believe he was right, at least thats when my world ended.
I was eleven. on December 8th of 1999 I moved to the united states from England, from my friends, my father and my brothers, my farm, my horses, everything I ever knew was no more and me and my mother had to settle down an make a new life for ourselves here. by the time the millennium rolled around my mother had finally chosen one of her "special friends" to settle down with and we moved in with him and they were married before January had even got here.
he was a nice man in the beginning, we got along for a time, until they started disagreeing about things.they fought about everything from what temperature the a/c should be set at to who was paying what bill. I used to lie awake at night and listen to them yelling at each other. He punched the walls a lot.
when January finally did get here my mother and I were afraid for our lives. she did a background check on him and found out that he had other counts of domestic violence on his record.
by then some of my friends had migrated over from England for various reasons, parents work and things like that. little did I know that those very same friends would contribute to my downward spiral.
my mother worked the night shifts at a hotel, HE often drank himself to sleep by 7:00pm so what else would I do with my time? I went to my friends house. he was older than me, and I looked up to him. little did I know that this was a big mistake, I remember the night I started sliding...the night that he gave me a drink from his dads liquor cabinet. that night I told him all about the man my mother married, and how he treated us, and how my mother had started treating me like the house maid. he noticed that I had been scratching my hands till they bled and my friend gave me a razor.
it began.
over the next few months I continued on this path, drinking more, picking up the razor when I heard my then step-dad hit my mother. not long after that they got divorced and my mother and I moved into a small apartment not to far away.
she continued to have "special friends" come and visit her and work the night shift, and so i continued to go and see my friend(s) and we continued to drink except now we also figured out where to buy cheap drugs and I hoped they would help me forget just as much as the razor helped me deal with my life.
I was told by the time I got to the end of 8th grade that I had to repeat it, not because I had failed, but because I was put into 6th grade when I moved here and I was supposed to be in 5th. that night I dove even deeper into my addictions and I just didn't care.
but the one thing that remained constant the whole time I went into my spiral was my best friend Timmy. he was the only positive influence in my life, and the only Christian influence. by the time I was 16 my mother had remarried a mean she met over the internet, we had moved again, I was raped by someone I thought was a good friend, almost beaten to death by the friend that introduced me to the razor, and molested by the man that my mother had married. I continued on my path of self destruction and the only person who had a clue about it was T.
I kept diving deeper and deeper.
that year in September T asked me to marry him on the beach at sunset. he gave me a gold ring that I still wear to this day. little did I know that a month later on October 2nd(6 days before my 17th birthday) he would be found dead on the living room floor of his house. his heart had given up, I always told him that his big heart would be the death of him. that night I cut my arms up so badly that I almost passed out from the blood loss.
that march I met the new pastor of this church that I had been visiting on and off with another good friend in secret because at the time me and my mother were wiccan. thats when my world started turn around. over the last few days and weeks I became closer to the pastors family and especially his son. and in turn his son became closer to me and my friend that took me to church on and off.
on april 2nd there was a big Christian festival in Orlando that the church was going to after service, and so my friend and the pastors son took it upon themselves to "kidnap" me and take me with the church to this festival. I will never forget that day, this is the day that completely shook the foundation of my soul and tipped my world upside down. there was a big motocross demo that we went to watch, and Ill admit it was very impressive but the part that made it unforgettable was what the preacher said after the demo." if you needed a blood transfusion to survive would you take it? someone donated that blood so that you could live. let Jesus be your blood donor. he shed his blood so that you could have life" I recalled the night that I sat on my bathroom floor and almost passed out because I lost so much blood and the preacher continued on and invited all that wished to come forward and be saved to the center of the demo ring.
I didn't walk. I dropped my soda on my friends foot and I ran. I pushed through the crowd and I ran to meet Jesus.
the next day I went around to each one of my friends that were causing me harm and dropped them like hot potatoes. I threw away all of my wiccan things, and never went back to the old hang out spot where people gathered to destroy there lives.
I cant say that I didn't stray of the path of god though, because I did, and I still struggle to stay away from the razor and the bottles of alcohol and drugs. but with the help of the few very good friends and the help from Jesus I can take it one day and one step at a time
my ethics teacher asked us on a test recently to tell him a life shaping event that defines us and the ethics we use today. unfortunately I didn't have enough courage or words to answer the question with what I want to tell him, but I still feel like I have to tell people how I wanted to answer this question it would have gone something like this...
6) give me an example of a life shaping event that helped define who you are and your ethics:
my name is Holly Andrew but you can call me rain, I'm 19 years old and I live in a small town in Florida.I'm a follower of Christ, a musician,an artist of sorts, an animal lover, and a recovering cutter/drug addict.
people say that Nostradamus screwed up when he predicted the end of the world would be on the eve of the year 2000. I believe he was right, at least thats when my world ended.
I was eleven. on December 8th of 1999 I moved to the united states from England, from my friends, my father and my brothers, my farm, my horses, everything I ever knew was no more and me and my mother had to settle down an make a new life for ourselves here. by the time the millennium rolled around my mother had finally chosen one of her "special friends" to settle down with and we moved in with him and they were married before January had even got here.
he was a nice man in the beginning, we got along for a time, until they started disagreeing about things.they fought about everything from what temperature the a/c should be set at to who was paying what bill. I used to lie awake at night and listen to them yelling at each other. He punched the walls a lot.
when January finally did get here my mother and I were afraid for our lives. she did a background check on him and found out that he had other counts of domestic violence on his record.
by then some of my friends had migrated over from England for various reasons, parents work and things like that. little did I know that those very same friends would contribute to my downward spiral.
my mother worked the night shifts at a hotel, HE often drank himself to sleep by 7:00pm so what else would I do with my time? I went to my friends house. he was older than me, and I looked up to him. little did I know that this was a big mistake, I remember the night I started sliding...the night that he gave me a drink from his dads liquor cabinet. that night I told him all about the man my mother married, and how he treated us, and how my mother had started treating me like the house maid. he noticed that I had been scratching my hands till they bled and my friend gave me a razor.
it began.
over the next few months I continued on this path, drinking more, picking up the razor when I heard my then step-dad hit my mother. not long after that they got divorced and my mother and I moved into a small apartment not to far away.
she continued to have "special friends" come and visit her and work the night shift, and so i continued to go and see my friend(s) and we continued to drink except now we also figured out where to buy cheap drugs and I hoped they would help me forget just as much as the razor helped me deal with my life.
I was told by the time I got to the end of 8th grade that I had to repeat it, not because I had failed, but because I was put into 6th grade when I moved here and I was supposed to be in 5th. that night I dove even deeper into my addictions and I just didn't care.
but the one thing that remained constant the whole time I went into my spiral was my best friend Timmy. he was the only positive influence in my life, and the only Christian influence. by the time I was 16 my mother had remarried a mean she met over the internet, we had moved again, I was raped by someone I thought was a good friend, almost beaten to death by the friend that introduced me to the razor, and molested by the man that my mother had married. I continued on my path of self destruction and the only person who had a clue about it was T.
I kept diving deeper and deeper.
that year in September T asked me to marry him on the beach at sunset. he gave me a gold ring that I still wear to this day. little did I know that a month later on October 2nd(6 days before my 17th birthday) he would be found dead on the living room floor of his house. his heart had given up, I always told him that his big heart would be the death of him. that night I cut my arms up so badly that I almost passed out from the blood loss.
that march I met the new pastor of this church that I had been visiting on and off with another good friend in secret because at the time me and my mother were wiccan. thats when my world started turn around. over the last few days and weeks I became closer to the pastors family and especially his son. and in turn his son became closer to me and my friend that took me to church on and off.
on april 2nd there was a big Christian festival in Orlando that the church was going to after service, and so my friend and the pastors son took it upon themselves to "kidnap" me and take me with the church to this festival. I will never forget that day, this is the day that completely shook the foundation of my soul and tipped my world upside down. there was a big motocross demo that we went to watch, and Ill admit it was very impressive but the part that made it unforgettable was what the preacher said after the demo." if you needed a blood transfusion to survive would you take it? someone donated that blood so that you could live. let Jesus be your blood donor. he shed his blood so that you could have life" I recalled the night that I sat on my bathroom floor and almost passed out because I lost so much blood and the preacher continued on and invited all that wished to come forward and be saved to the center of the demo ring.
I didn't walk. I dropped my soda on my friends foot and I ran. I pushed through the crowd and I ran to meet Jesus.
the next day I went around to each one of my friends that were causing me harm and dropped them like hot potatoes. I threw away all of my wiccan things, and never went back to the old hang out spot where people gathered to destroy there lives.
I cant say that I didn't stray of the path of god though, because I did, and I still struggle to stay away from the razor and the bottles of alcohol and drugs. but with the help of the few very good friends and the help from Jesus I can take it one day and one step at a time
