Day 7
Posted: Tue Jul 03, 2012 7:25 pm
Today's course know your mind, has brought a lot of issues to the forefront about my mind and how clouded it continues to be..thoughts and feelings about confusion and heartache continue...however..the lord Jesus is strong in me and I continue to pray and thank him for all the progress he has made in me so far
I had a dream about my ex gf last night and as I awoke I immediately went to the lord in prayer and thanked him for showing me that anger..impatience and jealousy still linger in my heart..I asked him to please replace those emotions with compassion..understanding and patience
I made a commitment to God today..I committed to not have sex again until I was married...I symbolized this vow with HIM with a ring on my middle finger next to my ring finger..I vowed that it will not be removed from my finger until my wedding night and then it will be removed by my wife....I have had this thought of commitment in my mind for the last 3 days..however I didn't want to commit to it just in case me and my ex gf got back together..BUT then I realized that is exactly the reason why I need to do it..So I can focus on getting to know her and her spiritual needs and about her hopes and dreams and fears and really find out about this beautiful gift that God has given me to take care of and guide.
I am also reading daily about how to be a godly husband and father...at the very least even if we don't get back together I will be prepared to be a godly husband to someone else...BUT I truly feel in my heart that we are meant to be together and when God has completed or at least given me the tools necessary to provide her with unconditional love and spiritual guidance then he will bring us back together...Yes I have moments where I have doubts about her ever wanting to get back together with me..However..It is the will of God that will prevail in the end and if HIS will is for us to be together then that's exactly what is going to happen..So I have given it all to HIM for his will to be done not mine
I have completed my spiritual growth chart for the day and feel really great about the positive changes that GOD is making in my life..prayer works and every time I feel pain or doubt..I pray for god to take it from me and give me signs of hope and inspiration (sometimes it doesn't come as quickly as I want..But he always answers me)
I read the godly jealousy course and next I am going to read the anger management study guide...I feel GOD is revealing areas of my life to me that need to be mended and I couldn't be more excited about this whole experience
Although my faith may waver at moments and I may have periods of doubt..I will NEVER surrender to the devil EVER AGAIN!!!!!..I will continue this journey no matter the cost all for the glory of the lord Jesus
Please keep all of your prayers and words of encouragement coming..Jesus knows exactly what I need to hear to help me to keep the faith and stay strong..God Bless you all and thank you so much for sharing this journey with me
I had a dream about my ex gf last night and as I awoke I immediately went to the lord in prayer and thanked him for showing me that anger..impatience and jealousy still linger in my heart..I asked him to please replace those emotions with compassion..understanding and patience
I made a commitment to God today..I committed to not have sex again until I was married...I symbolized this vow with HIM with a ring on my middle finger next to my ring finger..I vowed that it will not be removed from my finger until my wedding night and then it will be removed by my wife....I have had this thought of commitment in my mind for the last 3 days..however I didn't want to commit to it just in case me and my ex gf got back together..BUT then I realized that is exactly the reason why I need to do it..So I can focus on getting to know her and her spiritual needs and about her hopes and dreams and fears and really find out about this beautiful gift that God has given me to take care of and guide.
I am also reading daily about how to be a godly husband and father...at the very least even if we don't get back together I will be prepared to be a godly husband to someone else...BUT I truly feel in my heart that we are meant to be together and when God has completed or at least given me the tools necessary to provide her with unconditional love and spiritual guidance then he will bring us back together...Yes I have moments where I have doubts about her ever wanting to get back together with me..However..It is the will of God that will prevail in the end and if HIS will is for us to be together then that's exactly what is going to happen..So I have given it all to HIM for his will to be done not mine
I have completed my spiritual growth chart for the day and feel really great about the positive changes that GOD is making in my life..prayer works and every time I feel pain or doubt..I pray for god to take it from me and give me signs of hope and inspiration (sometimes it doesn't come as quickly as I want..But he always answers me)
I read the godly jealousy course and next I am going to read the anger management study guide...I feel GOD is revealing areas of my life to me that need to be mended and I couldn't be more excited about this whole experience
Although my faith may waver at moments and I may have periods of doubt..I will NEVER surrender to the devil EVER AGAIN!!!!!..I will continue this journey no matter the cost all for the glory of the lord Jesus
Please keep all of your prayers and words of encouragement coming..Jesus knows exactly what I need to hear to help me to keep the faith and stay strong..God Bless you all and thank you so much for sharing this journey with me