Ambers Stepping Stones 2 & 3
Posted: Wed Jun 22, 2011 10:01 amWell my life has been a lil crazy lately so I didn't have time to write in my journal on the second day, so I'm doing 2 & 3 together 
. Both of these stepping stones have REALLY made me think. I'm pretty sure most of my trouble is coming from the fact that I'm having a hard time forgiving myself for things I've done in my past and things I did wrong in my marriage. I'm putting the blame all on myself when it comes to that. I'm not really sure why, but I am. I keep thinking "If I had just done this", or "If I hadn't done that", maybe things would be different. I know that's not for me to decide but I think when something bad happens to most people they try and analyze everything about it. I have an anxiety disorder which makes the whole analyzing sequence even worse for me. I really shouldn't analyze anything but it's a part of my disorder so it's hard not to. I DO believe in God's Grace and I TRUST God wholeheartedly; it still doesn't doesn't stop my sinful nature from worrying, analyzing and making myself miserable. I know God doesn't want that from me. I know this trust me. It still doesn't make it any easier. I pray every day and every night for the Lord to take that feeling away from me. I believe he will and I believe his will will be done in my life. The waiting is hard but will be worth it!! 
. Both of these stepping stones have REALLY made me think. I'm pretty sure most of my trouble is coming from the fact that I'm having a hard time forgiving myself for things I've done in my past and things I did wrong in my marriage. I'm putting the blame all on myself when it comes to that. I'm not really sure why, but I am. I keep thinking "If I had just done this", or "If I hadn't done that", maybe things would be different. I know that's not for me to decide but I think when something bad happens to most people they try and analyze everything about it. I have an anxiety disorder which makes the whole analyzing sequence even worse for me. I really shouldn't analyze anything but it's a part of my disorder so it's hard not to. I DO believe in God's Grace and I TRUST God wholeheartedly; it still doesn't doesn't stop my sinful nature from worrying, analyzing and making myself miserable. I know God doesn't want that from me. I know this trust me. It still doesn't make it any easier. I pray every day and every night for the Lord to take that feeling away from me. I believe he will and I believe his will will be done in my life. The waiting is hard but will be worth it!! 
praying that your anxiety is melting away as you take these healing steps and search the word of God. This study has a lot of scripture to explore and there is healing in God's word and fellowship and sharing with other people in your victorys and your short comings we are here for one another, I can relate to alot of what you sharing