Ron's Journal Day 3
Posted: Thu Jun 09, 2011 11:28 am
I need to forgive myself.....
I've forgiven others, yet I see that I haven't fully forgiven myself..... I still cry because I ruined my Marraige on occasion,
I still have a decent relationship with the ex.... Yesterday, for no reason I bought Lunch and took it to her, and told her I was glad to do it, It made me happy....
Then, wrote a letter to the former GF, and let her know that I hold nothing against her, that I pray and bless her, hope her life is fruitful, her children are successful.... That If she needs my help I am here....
Something I realise this morning, the only thing holding me back was me......
I had a good chat last night with my pastor before bible study, talked about relationships, the ups and downs, what to do..... He's knows everything... He's seen me the first time I came to that church, messed up, a look of despair, totally lost, He's known of the tough times i want thru the last 2 years, being homeless, unemployed, Just holding onto faith that I would get thru all this , trying to make a relationship that was most likely wrong work, lawyers, Losses, Phew!!!!
I do know this.... I am alive, and I need to get out there and give it all I got.... make life beautiful for someone, or Many!
and make it beautiful for myself as well!
I've forgiven others, yet I see that I haven't fully forgiven myself..... I still cry because I ruined my Marraige on occasion,
I still have a decent relationship with the ex.... Yesterday, for no reason I bought Lunch and took it to her, and told her I was glad to do it, It made me happy....
Then, wrote a letter to the former GF, and let her know that I hold nothing against her, that I pray and bless her, hope her life is fruitful, her children are successful.... That If she needs my help I am here....
Something I realise this morning, the only thing holding me back was me......
I had a good chat last night with my pastor before bible study, talked about relationships, the ups and downs, what to do..... He's knows everything... He's seen me the first time I came to that church, messed up, a look of despair, totally lost, He's known of the tough times i want thru the last 2 years, being homeless, unemployed, Just holding onto faith that I would get thru all this , trying to make a relationship that was most likely wrong work, lawyers, Losses, Phew!!!!
I do know this.... I am alive, and I need to get out there and give it all I got.... make life beautiful for someone, or Many!
and make it beautiful for myself as well!