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I haven't written in my journal for the past two or so days. About a month ago there was a woman who came to our Bible study. I don't know her very well, but she seems to have a close and powerful relationship with God. Just knowing how much He loves her as her Abba, Daddy. She has wonderful trust in God. She said she had to have surgery on her knee, torn meniscus, but she couldn't have it because the doc said she had to have someone with her for the first night. I volunteered because I know I need to step up to the plate. If I say I love God? I have a job where I type at home so I can rearrange things to a degree. Thursday came. The surgery went well. But I was so out of my comfort zone because I was serving someone and I am not used to that. My husband is retired. He has always been the cook of the house. So he does all of that stuff. While over at Debra's house, I was really stressed. I felt like a chicken with my head cut off (but God is greater!). Debra told me always let God be our period (punctuation mark) at the end of our sentences. So "God is greater" is my punctuation mark on that negative thought. I cooked cornbread for her. Heated up the soup my husband had made. Tried to be there to get her what she needed. This morning I made her scrambled eggs, waffle on her waffle iron and heated up some sausage. I certainly hadn't planned on all that. But it was good for me so appreciate what my husband does.

Today when I was supposed to go home, it seemed she was feeling a little more poorly and asked if I could spend tonight with her as well. This is tough because I was so looking forward to going home and being back in my comfort zone. But I told her yes. But I was going to go home for a little and get a shower and relax a bit and then come back. This is where I am now. While here, I had to analyze some of my reactions. Some thoughts were: feeling put out and not having a right attitude. I am trying to relate my learning to serve with the way Jesus served us, even unto dying on the cross. I am going back tonight hopefully seeing through His eyes her need. I really, really hope she doesn't ask me to stay tomorrow as well. I know I am not up to that.

Hello Dabs

God bless you this day.

Well, well, look at you -- stepping out and stepping up. Dabs, you do see the struggle, the war within ourselves. One side of us (the carnal side) wants to stay in our comfort zone, and Another side of us (the newly ignited spirit side) of us wants to do as God calls us to do.

I love your honesty. See, many of us are tempted to turn a blind eye to others' needs, or if and when we do something for someone, to brag about how good we are. Nope, not Dabs, you speak about the internal struggle, and expose it to God's Light. Nothing hidden! I just got to hug ya, Dabs

If you are anything like me, you feel like you are repenting all day long. But isn't it awesome?!!! That is key in our relationship with The Lord. We are not God, and the sooner we come to terms with that blessed reality, wooooooohoooooo!!! But, we are called to do for Him, to represent Him -- our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ. And you did just that Dabs, you allowed Christ Jesus to live out His life in you and you helped another, when there was no gain in it for you.

Mankind does not want to be inconvenienced. Our flesh does not want to be put out. It is a struggle, it is a war within. And you allowed God to win this battle. Praise God!!! Hallelujah!!!

The Apostle Paul wrote about it so eloquently in Romans Chapter 7.

Dabs, you are fighting the good fight of faith. Awesome, Awesome, Awesome!!! Thank You Jesus.

By the way, my hubby does most of the cooking in our household, too. He loves to cook and he happens to be an awesome cook, as well. Yummmmmmmmm! Wooooohoooooo!!!

Isn't it wonderful how The Lord opens our eyes to see the blessings, too?!!! Thank You Lord!

I'm so excited for you, Dabs. You have committed to The Lord, and He is embracing you.

God bless and keep you.
Love,
Mack

Wow dabs! Way to go sis. Getting out there and doing for another to the point you are out of your comfort zone.

Praying for you to be guided by Him today. His will be done. May you be blessed greatly.

Dabs...may God bless you for stepping up to do something for a soul in need. Dabs, God loves a cheerful giver and wants you to do so with all your heart...don't be afraid of being out of your comfort zone...because to this lady you are helping...you are giving her a gift that no one else could...care and love.

Dabs another thing sis...I believe that we always need to make the MAIN thing the main thing in our lives...and serving God is just that...I know God is proud of you.

luv ya

Thanks for the the encouragement! I wanted to tell you something God did for me. While I was there the first night and was feeling really, really stressed, another lady who I know better, came to visit. She just is one to take the bull by the horns and did some vacuuming, washed some dishes and offered to wash towels. That was eye opening. As I was feeling like "I'm not doing things right," I happened to walk into the living room and there on the floor was a sign, about, 6" x 3" tall. It was one word "BLESSED" in big black bold letters like that. I know that was from God. He told me that just being there I was being a blessing and He blesses me! You know how it got there? Her dog dragged from her bedroom to the living room. He had never done that before.

After I wrote to you all in my journal last night, I headed back over to Debra's. The lady who leads my Bible study, Sadie, was there and had visited with Debra for a while. It was so good to seed Sadie. She instantly has a way of putting people at ease. Must be that love of God. She stayed a while longer. I told her and Debra that I felt like I was at a pivotal point and to pray for me. I told them that I felt like it would be so easy for me to return to my comfort zone and turn backwards. I asked them to pray that I continue moving forward. We prayed and then she left. After that I felt so much calmer and actually was glad to be there doing what I could. I feel like God honored that prayer. I feel more free, more calm, more joyful than I could have imagined.

Here is what God is showing me through Psalms 78:21-22. When the children of Israel saw all the things God did for them, after a while they forgot. It says "the Lord heard this and was furious... because they did not BELIEVE in God and did NOT TRUST in HIS SALVATION." That's how I felt when I wanted to turn back to my comfort zone. Then in Psalm 78:32-33: In spite of this (what God had done for them), they did NOT BELIEVE in HIS wondrous works. Therefore their days HE CONSUMED IN FUTILITY AND THEIR YEARS IN FEAR.

I'm thinking that because I have leaned more towards my comfort zone (not trusting God), that's why my "days have been consumed in futility, and my years in fear."

dabs...often when we step out to do what God calls us to do...we are out of our comfort zones...imagine how Paul must have felt to step out for God the first time after being a persecutor of Christians for so long...talk about being out of your comfort zone huh? I'm so glad you are taking the leaps of faith that God wants you to have...and now you will find that there is nothing more rewarding than to help out another.

luv ya

Hello Dabs

I hope you are well, dear sister in Christ.

Just wanted to stop by and check on you, and to let you know that you continue in my prayers to our Lord.

God's blessed will be done.

God bless and keep you.
Love,
Mack

I have been up and down lately. Haven't been on my steps enough. I am stuck at making a Growth Chart. Goals have always been difficult. Commitment even worse. I feel like the day just gets away without me accomplishing much. I have been down on myself because Monday my husband turns 60. I felt I "should" have a party for him. Parties give me the willies, not as much going to one but the thought of giving one, my anxiety goes off the charts. I woke up out of a sound sleep Sunday night worrying about what I should do. I finally just spoke to my husband about it. He is a very shy person. He does not want any fuss. He doesn't want to be the center of attention especially at 60. So, I feel relieved, but still wearing guilt. We are watching our pennies to be able to meet our bills. I could cook him dinner. I'm not sure he'll enjoy it, but I know he will enjoy not having to do it himself. I feel overwhelmed so easily. With this chart thing, I'm feeling pressured. I guess the real thing is, I'm afraid if I put stuff down on paper, I'll see my failures looking back at me. I'm all over the place right now. Thanks for drawing me back, Mack. I feel like I have to lick my wounds a bit. Pity party. Yeah, I'm good at those.

Hey sis. Start easy with this chart. Keep it simple. Baby steps. Such as if you never read your bible, making a goal to read a chapter a day is unreasonable. But to read ONE verse a day is achievable. And some days you will read more than one verse.

You need this chart to help you get organized. It's a good tool not a bad thing.

Failure. Consider each one a learning curve. Take what you learned, get up and try again. God doesn't expect us to have it all figured out so why do we?

Break your goals down into smaller portions. Say you want to keep a tidier house. To set a goal to have the house tidy is to over whelming if you're not use to this. So set a goal of having your dishes done every day before bed. After a month of this add to it that you'll do one load of laundry a day. Or something simular.

Paperwork out of control? Set a goal to spend just 15 minutes every day to organizing it. To organize an out of control pile of paper is to depressing and over whelming but to spend 15 minutes is not so bad. You can do that. And you will be surprised how quickly it is taken care of.

These are just some examples dabs. Take what fits and take it easy on yourself. Baby steps.

Love ya

I was gonna say what piney said but she said it better.
I couldn't do the chart. Was too much like school work for me. And I wasn't a school person...hated it so avoid anything that looks like school. But it is easy to make a list or even a sticky note to remind you to do something.

Don't get hung up on this one thing to make you not continue with the study. It will not make you a failure but you need to continue doing the study, okay?

Glad you asked your husband. Best thing to do, so no guilt now! How about going out for some Chinese food on Monday? Not too expensive and will be memorable.

How about going out for some Chinese food on Monday?

He does love Chinese food and Raven's football and cigars and his lazy boy and he is good to go. Chinese it is!

Thanks, Deetu.

Hello Dabs

God bless you this day.

Awwwwwww Dabs, sometimes the thoughts of incorporating change into our lives are more difficult than actually doing them. You have already started changing the way you think, because you are confessing things that come through your mind that tempt you, but you also choose to repent, praise and honor The Lord instead. Not only are you honoring God, but you are also weeding your garden and planting the most blessed seed. It is all in the blessed relationship with our Lord.

One way you can incorporate change into your life is: with every chore you do in any given day, talk to The Lord (silently or aloud -- your choice) while you are doing the chore.

Periodically throughout the day, ask The Holy Spirit to show you something in The Word, and then open your Bible and point -- wherever your finger lands -- read it. Also, if there are any other scripture reference notations at the end of the scripture you pointed to -- go and read that one too.

Example: Hebrews 4:7 Again, he limiteth a certain day, saying in David, To-day, after so long a time; as it is said,, To-day if ye will hear his voice, harden not your hearts.

In my Bible, after that scripture is a little notation Psalm 95:7, so I turn to that scripture and read it. Psalm 95:7 For he is our God; and we are the people of his pasture, and the sheep of his hand. To-day if ye will hear his voice.

Then thank The Holy Spirit for sharing His blessed Word with you.

Dabs, The Lord loves you so very much. He loves to hear from you and to connect with you -- even when performing the tiniest of chores, or brushing your teeth, or pouring a cup of coffee. Take that opportunity to say Thank You Lord.

Take time to read some of the other posts by other brothers and sisters. Even if you do not want to type a response, you can pray for them, in your prayer closet, with God alone. Everyone needs prayer, and praying for others is one of the most loving things you can do for them. I'm reminded of Anna in the second chapter of Luke (verses 36-38). She was an awesome prayer warrior. Praise God.

And as far as your husband's birthday dinner -- Chinese food sounds awesome, especially since you said he really like Chinese food. But, remember Dabs, it is not so much in the food or the gifts, our relationship with our spouses far surpasses such temporal things. Enjoy one another's company.

Dabs, we so often place pressure on ourselves by watching and listening to what things everyone else "appears" to be doing. This is not a competition, and I am sure God doesn't want you to feel so down over such things. The Lord loves you and your husband.

I continue to send up prayers to our Lord, on your behalf. God's blessed will be done.

God bless and keep you.
Love,
Mack