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I'm still writing my journal even though I am only on stone 4. I haven't gotten what I need to get into my spirit yet. I went to my Bible study class tonight, but I was struggling with social fear. With that came anxiety and an inability to be myself. I also struggle with physically being close to people. That fear reaction causes sweating all over. I'm so busy thinking about the nearness of people and my response to that fear of sweating that my mind gets wired on PANIC mode. Needless to say, I heard very little of the study and found it extremely difficult to pray. I did speak to the Bible study leader a little before I left, and I did reveal to her my fear and of even being close to be people and holding hands. I'm struggling right now because I am seeing the results of years of unkempt weeds. They are overwhelming me right now. I want to pull the weeds, but they seem so thick I'm not sure where to begin. But I found this verse when I opened my Bible so I'll start with it:

Micah 7:7-8 But as for me, I will watch expectantly for the Lord; I will wait for the God of my salvation. My God will hear me. DO NOT REJOICE OVER ME, O MY ENEMY. Though I fall, I WILL RISE. Though I dwell in darkness, The LORD is a ligt for me.

I shall know the truth and the truth shall make me free. I know that satan is a lier and master deceiver. I confess that this fear and self-consciousness is a manipulation of the devil to keep me from doing what God has planned for my life. I ask you, here at COOL, to stand with me. Where two or more are gathered in Jesus' name, there He is in the midst. I speak to you satan, "Take these thoughts that you have embedded into my conscious and unconscious mind and be cast out into utter darkness where you belong, because there is no light in you. But before you leave, I command that you bow your knee to the authority of the Lord, Jesus Christ, in whose authority I cast you out. Be gone. Now!" Jesus, fill the void in my mind, emotions and spirit with Truth; with You. Thank you for revealing truth to me. Let me not fall back into the patterns of thinking of my past. You have commanded me to be strong and of good courage and that you will never leave me nor forsake me. The battle is not mine; but belongs to You. And You are already my Victor, my King, my Savior, my Redeemer. I receive victory over the enemy. I declare it done. In Jesus' name. Be glorified. Thank You, Jesus. Thank You, Father. Thank You, precious Holy Spirit.

Dabs, I just got through writing you like a 2 page letter... then hit the wrong button and 'poof' it was all gone... Boy does the devil not like what I'm trying to tell you or what? :-) I know he is sooo mad and it didn't make me real happy that it happened either but... I didn't let him talk me out of writing to you again or get angry so he lost this fight! PTL! :-) I'll try and rem what the point was at least. My main thing was telling you that one of the BEST things you have already done is to tell someone about the problem so others will be in prayer for you too. That's what satan hates more than anything is to have more than YOU praying about it! He knows he will defeated in the end because the LORD promises that if 2 or 3 are gathered in HIS NAME HE is in the mist of them, and anything they ask HE will answer! YES!!! So.. here we are gathered on the net and you told your teacher so that is even more! :-) Now all you have to rem is the next time you start feeling these feelings.. say..."GET THEE BEHIND ME SATAN IN THE NAME OF JESUS!" He HAS to FLEE! And the problems do too! Fight the good fight of FAITH and ALL things will WORK OUT FOR THE GOOD! YES!!! Keep trusting in all the things you READ in the BIBLE and YOU WILL OVERCOME! Another PROMISE!!! :-) Let me say a prayer for you too...

Dear Lord, I come to you now in YOUR AWESOME NAME and ASK that You show Dabs the exact words to say to satan when having any problems. You say in Your Word, "All you who are heavy laden come to me & I will give you rest!" I know for a fact that YOU are a GOD of LOVE, UNDERSTANDING, HELP IN TIMES OF TROUBLE, LOVER OF MY SOUL, THE ONE WHO ANSWERS ALL PRAYERS OF THOSE WHO LOVE YOU! So we are asking You NOW to HELP IN DABS time of trouble and HEAL all these feelings of ANXIETY, FEAR, DOUBT & ANY OTHER FEELING that is stopping her from having the VICTORY in her LIFE! I Thank You for all your going to do now in Your Precious Name Jesus.. AMEN!

Now it is up to You to BELIEVE THESE WORDS, an to ACT on them the next time satan brings up anything that is going to stop you from being HAPPY & JOYFUL ... I hope these things have helped you and if you need anything that I can help you with at anytime just email me. I will keep you on my prayer list. God knows YOU & ME and knows what we both need. May your life be filled with MANY BLESSINGS that you don't know what to do! :-) Bless You always! Linda

Hi dabs

I'm so glad you shared.

I think many struggle with social anxiety to some degree but don't realize it or admit to it.

What has helped me is knowing who I am in Christ and knowing how He thinks and feels about me. To turn to Him when feeling anxiety for direction and acceptance.

Keep seeking a closer relationship with him. Closer and closer every day. If you are having trouble accepting day #4 just go on tomorrow but keep coming back to the step so you make sure you get it set firm with in.

Many struggle to forgiven themselves. It is a plan of the enemy to stop us from receiving what Christ did on the cross for us. When we fall down it allows God to have the glory because then His grace has an opportunity to work.