Christianity Oasis Member Forum & Chat Room

Forgiveness, oh how i long for it and how i long to grant it. What stops me??? I've been wrestling w/ asking someones forgiveness, I crossed a boundary and it caused someone to take offense. I dont have have problem admitting my mistake, it's the allowing myself to be in a vulnerable position again that is difficult for me.

I'm also struggling w/ forgiving myself. There are so many weeds to pull--God please help.

chelle, I want you to know that saying I'm sorry is not going to open you up to being vulnerable. What it will do is allow peace to come into a situation where there is still hurt. It doesn't mean that situation has to be allowed to occur again either...it's just calming the tide that now is rushing at you.

As for forgiving yourself...this is hard for all of us I think. We do something, and we often beat ourselves up over and over...but that isn't what Jesus wants us to do, because He died so we wouldn't be held captive under sin anymore. Forgiving yourself is necessary sis...it's the way to move forward.

Praying for you.

luv ya

Hello chelle,

You asked whats stopping me?


it is our own selves that stops us.


I have been reading helpful bible verses that has helped me, like "the LORD is close to broken-hearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit" psalm 34:18. That is a really powerful message, because it is like saying that no matter what you do or go the LORD our God will always be with us. Another bible verse I love and has meaning is "Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight." proverbs 3:5-6 So to me even if you are really hurt or confused about God then don't worry. Just trust in him, and everything will be alright.

so what is a broken heart? Is it the fact that you have so much hurt? Or the fact you can't feel God?


He will heal you of your hurt if you go to him, he loves you no matter what, for he is a gracious God. Do not let a broken heart separate you from God, for it does no good to yourself or to God.

God bless
♥Jill

Forgiving yourself is hard huh? Welcome to the club. I do believe that was one of the harderst steps I took but well worth it. I had to say Lord even tho I don't think that I deserve it, I forgive myself. Please help me make that a knowing of the heart and ot just of the head. He is faithful to help us when we ask.
So glad to see you pressing through. Keep up the good work!

Well, I did ask for forgiveness, directly, straight to the point. The response--I was never offended to begin with. What???? I been beating myself up for days over a stupid misunderstanding??? Oh well, it's over, lesson learned (I hope).

chelle, God bless you sis. I had to laugh a lil when i read your last post...not at you...but because ive done the same thing so many times. ive asked for forgiveness from someone and they looked at me like i was nuts or asked...umm..for what?

However..in asking them, the Lord showed you how to release you from a lie the enemy had planted in your head. And it was good to ask this person. Relationships are relationships because of the knowing..because of the relating. Not to say you have to know everything and every thought of another, nor they you, but in relating honest feelings...hurt is often from a misunderstanding.

there are times too, when we hurt someone and we dont know it. and there are times when someone has hurt us and they dont know it. Forgiving isnt based on whether or not you will get an apology, but rather, giving it to the Lord and letting Him be in control.

Forgiving yourself is not easy cuz the enemy of our souls loves to condemn and accuse constantly. We have to choose to believe the Lord's words when He said that when you honestly repent, He forgives. The whole reason for the cross and Christ's blood..and His grace is sufficient.

Keep goin, girl. Your doing an awesome job.

in Jesus,
love momo

Awww glad you asked...now you have peace So happy for you...and yes a valuable lesson to take with you the next time a misunderstanding occurs.

luv ya