Christianity Oasis Forum
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Bisonfan again day 2
There are so many weeds in my life and I often how to wonder how to get rid of them. I have been so routed in the beliefs that I am not worthy and a failure in life that even when I go back to scripture and keep trying to remind myself that this is not true and God loves me and He erally does care and He has a purpose I know it in my head from being in church but I do not know it in my heart. It is very difficult concept for me to graso right now. I do all I can to keep remembering so I can hold on to God.
I made a comment yesterday that I was released from the hospital and I know there was a purpose for that visit even though I absolutely hated it. I went in right after awanas so I was still in my awana shirt and so people knew I was a christian but they respsected me because I was not pushing them there. One night I had been doing well and sitting with quite a few girls that I was getting close to. One of the guys had come up a person and asked if she was born again and she had no idea what it meant so he walked away. Later that night we were all talking and she asked if anyone knew what being born again was, she said was it like coming out of our mothers womb because that was absurd. so here I am with people who I am close to and they respect me and I explain the salvation message and what being born again really is. I never reapproached because I knew if they had more questions they would ask, but I know God used me to plant some seeds.
Another thing was one morning I woke up early in the morning and asked if I could turn on the tv and they said yes because it was after 6am. earlier someone said there was a gospel music station so I went to find it and it was amazing and so calming to be able to hear my music again. One song came on and it is by Jeremy camp called "Take you back" God really brought me to him and I could feel him just holding me there in the hsopital. there was another guy and he said he even felt the holy spirit in the room. Then another thing is that I got close to a few girls and one of them God told me that I needed to write her a letter and to include parts of Psalms 139 do not know where that went because she got it after I left but it was so strong on my heart that sheneeded to know she was loved and not a mistake.
So yes there are many weeds of deep pain and abuse that my therapist is going to work through with me I am starting to find God.
I made a comment yesterday that I was released from the hospital and I know there was a purpose for that visit even though I absolutely hated it. I went in right after awanas so I was still in my awana shirt and so people knew I was a christian but they respsected me because I was not pushing them there. One night I had been doing well and sitting with quite a few girls that I was getting close to. One of the guys had come up a person and asked if she was born again and she had no idea what it meant so he walked away. Later that night we were all talking and she asked if anyone knew what being born again was, she said was it like coming out of our mothers womb because that was absurd. so here I am with people who I am close to and they respect me and I explain the salvation message and what being born again really is. I never reapproached because I knew if they had more questions they would ask, but I know God used me to plant some seeds.
Another thing was one morning I woke up early in the morning and asked if I could turn on the tv and they said yes because it was after 6am. earlier someone said there was a gospel music station so I went to find it and it was amazing and so calming to be able to hear my music again. One song came on and it is by Jeremy camp called "Take you back" God really brought me to him and I could feel him just holding me there in the hsopital. there was another guy and he said he even felt the holy spirit in the room. Then another thing is that I got close to a few girls and one of them God told me that I needed to write her a letter and to include parts of Psalms 139 do not know where that went because she got it after I left but it was so strong on my heart that sheneeded to know she was loved and not a mistake.
So yes there are many weeds of deep pain and abuse that my therapist is going to work through with me I am starting to find God.
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bisonfan
You know sis, I know you have those weeds and some of them are deeply rooted...but there is a very strong weed eater named Jesus, and He can take care of even the highest weeds. I see that you are beginning to reach for God and that as you continue to do so...He is gonna show you more and more. You are a beautiful soul, and God loves you so very much. Things are gonna get easier. Don't give up...keep fighting.
Praying for ya.
luv ya
Praying for ya.
luv ya
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mlg - Posts: 4428
- Marital Status: Not Interested
lil sister
Isnt it just so cool how God can use us in the midst of our pain to reach others?
It seems you are not only in the process of re-discovering God, but that you are also discovering that He has placed a calling on your life to serve Him How exciting is that!
Remember, feelings are deceptive. Emotions are influenced by our thoughts, and sometimes what we believe and what we think, does not line up with God's Word, meaning it is a lie. Cuz God's Word is the ultimate Truth. So trust in that above all else ok, and as you begin to discard the lies and replace them with Truth, you will find that those feelings of being unloved and unwanted will begin to diminish and give way to the Love of Christ.
Keep on the path lil one. You are doing so good
Me luvs ya!
Isnt it just so cool how God can use us in the midst of our pain to reach others?
It seems you are not only in the process of re-discovering God, but that you are also discovering that He has placed a calling on your life to serve Him How exciting is that!
Remember, feelings are deceptive. Emotions are influenced by our thoughts, and sometimes what we believe and what we think, does not line up with God's Word, meaning it is a lie. Cuz God's Word is the ultimate Truth. So trust in that above all else ok, and as you begin to discard the lies and replace them with Truth, you will find that those feelings of being unloved and unwanted will begin to diminish and give way to the Love of Christ.
Keep on the path lil one. You are doing so good
Me luvs ya!
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lizzie
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