Christianity Oasis Forum

[momof3]

Did you know that if a married woman, who is being physically abused by her husband in a marriage, approaches her pastor, preacher, Religious leader or even another Christian that 9 times out of 10 she will be told that by the LAW of the Bible she has to stay in that marriage?

They even go on to say that if she flees the fear, pain and suffering that she endures, day in and day out, that she will sin against GOD.

Well, well, well, the Pharisees are back!

THIS IS NOT TRUTH !!!

It must be nice sitting in a righteous marriage and passing judgment on another who became entangled in someone's web of deceit and fell in love only to find they had made a mistake and married a monster.

I oft times wonder if it was THEIR own child living in fear and pain ...
If they would pass such a judgment.

This is exactly what I was taught growing up in a certain denomination. My mother was divorced, so there was always this "shadow of condemnation" looming over our heads. (as a kid i was always at every alter call, every Sunday cause i just knew i'd done something that week that was gonna cause me to burn up in that place called Hell- i think they saved a place for me at the alter call ) This condemnation, I believe was a big part of my mom's depression and self-loathing. I met my ex-husband when I was 16. I secretly dated him because he was several years older than I and seemed to have all the answers. He was a christian..at least he went to church. As soon as I turned 18 I left home and married him. Months later, when I was close to 6 months pregnant, my husband decided he would go for a job interview. He didn't return for a month. His mother informed me after the first 24 hours of his being gone, that he had gone back to his ex-wife. A month later he called and asked if he could come home. Of course, shamed as I felt, married, pregnant, taught that divorce was wrong, I took him back. There were several times this man cheated with other women..to the point where I wondered what was wrong with me...what was I not doing as a wife? What was I not doing enough of? No matter what I tried, he cheated. It finally got to the point, because of what Id been taught.."till death do we part" that I began praying.....Lord either take him, or take me from this world. I had been informed by my doctor that i should be tested for AIDS because of my husband's infidelities.

While in the hospital, ill with stress, the pastor of my church came to visit. He brought a book with him and then later sent the women of the church to council with me about the marriage. I found God's truth..so unlike what I'd been taught all my life. When I was released from the hospital, I took the kids and went to my mother's. Although I had found the Lord's truth...that had I listened to Him to begin with, I would not have married this man (there were many signs I ignored along the way) and that this marriage was and had never been blessed by the Lord, the enemy kept whispering to me....divorce is wrong. One day in prayer, knowing my husband was going to move to another state, I asked the Lord...what if I'm wrong? What if You did bless this marriage and I just have to wait for You to work things out....His answer to me was...Don't you think I know how to call him back from (this other state) if it be My will for this marriage to be? Still, out of that same old fear and the enemy whispering to me that I would be alone for the rest of my life, I went back to him. Months later, my best friend informed me that she had just delivered my husband's son. Needless to say, I filed for divorce.

Long story, I know.....but I know now that this marriage was never meant to be. I know that it was not a holy union blessed by the Lord...and if I am to remain unmarried for the rest of my life, so be it. Whatever His will is. He knows the desires of my heart...but His will in my life is now so much more important than my desires.

[lizzie]

Momma

You are such a loving lady

I am sorry for the hurt and pain you went thru sister. And I am so happy to see you leaving it in God's hands now, and waiting for His guidance and instructions for your life.

What you went thru was not in vain, as God will use the bad for Good.

Luv u momma. Good to see you on this wonderful journey

[momof3]

aww, Lizzers..thank you, my sister...i love you, too. Believe me when I say that this was just the beginning of a long journey....one that I wouldn't trade for anything. There are no regrets now because the Lord has and will continue to use that vulnerable heart....He knew the choices I was going to make and has always used that hurt that was once there to feel, actually feel, what other women (and men) feel when their spouses cheat....along with the healing that comes from the Lord when we finally put Him and His will first in our broken shattered lives.


love you sis!!!

[Dora]

Momof3

Just wanted to stop by and say how you are such a wonderful example to so many.

Your faith is so strong.

God bless you on this path.

[momof3]

Pinester.......i love you. Wanted to say thank you for your kind and encouraging words..and to Lizzie too.

You know that verse in the bible...umm....lemme look it up real quick...


just another minute...........

ahhh...here it is..


Mark 9:23-24
23 Jesus said unto him, If thou canst believe, all things are possible to him that believeth.

24 And straightway the father of the child cried out, and said with tears, Lord, I believe; help thou mine unbelief.

There are so many times my carnal mind wants to say that there is no way out..there is no way around this..truth is, God said it, so it's true. We gotta remember that, no matter what we are facing.

This has to be one of my favorite reminders.....

Sometimes by Step by Rich Mullins

Sometimes the night was beautiful
Sometimes the sky was so far away
Sometimes it seemed to stoop so close
You could touch it but your heart would break
Sometimes the morning came too soon
Sometimes the day could be so hot
There was so much work left to do
But so much You'd already done

Oh God, You are my God
And I will ever praise You
Oh God, You are my God
And I will ever praise You
I will seek You in the morning
And I will learn to walk in Your ways
And step by step You'll lead me
And I will follow You all of my days

Sometimes I think of Abraham
How one star he saw had been lit for me
He was a stranger in this land
And I am that, no less than he
And on this road to righteousness
Sometimes the climb can be so steep
I may falter in my steps
But never beyond Your reach

Oh God, You are my God
And I will ever praise You
Oh God, You are my God
And I will ever praise You
I will seek You in the morning
And I will learn to walk in Your ways
And step by step You'll lead me
And I will follow You all of my days

And I will follow You all of my days
And I will follow You all of my days
And step by step You'll lead me
And I will follow You all of my days
And I will follow You all of my days
(Sometimes the night was beautiful)
And I will follow You all of my days