Christianity Oasis Forum

[Ann_is_Alive]

please read with care.
this may be very hard to read and has some language, but it is how i felt about my abuse.
during one of my recent flashbacks, i kept switching back and forth from me as a little girl and me now as an adult.
but for the first time, I asked Jesus to be there during the flashbacks.
these are the words that came out of me.




Mirror Mirror

Mirror, mirror on the wall,
Tell me who is the best of all?
I know it is never me,
But can you show me how to be?

Mirror, mirror on the wall,
Tell me who is the worst of all?
I know it is me,
But can you tell me how not to be?

Mirror, mirror, I know it is sad,
Cuz people know I am bad.
That is why they make me s*ck.
That is why they make me f*ck.

Mirror, mirror, I had a heart.
They saw it and still ripped it apart.
They destroyed my mind and my soul.
That was their ultimate goal.

Mirror, mirror, tell me what is wrong with me?
Why can I not just live and just be?
Why can I not just jump on my unicorn and just fly?
Just fly up to the rainbow in the sky?

Mirror, mirror, I want to again dance.
Little me and my unicorn used to prance.
But I made grandpa sick and weak.
So daddy made me the crippled freak.

Mirror, mirror, I hate being in the closet in the dark.
I scream, but that is always such a lark.
Why can I not ever touch the light?
Why can I not ever win this fight?

Mirror, mirror, they took my life.
So why am I still here? Why am I still alive in this strife?
Why did they steal that soul of mine?
Why do I smile and act like I am fine?

Mirror, mirror, I am in pain, always in too much pain.
I wish my spirit could once again dance in the rain.
But that can never be, so I wish I could die.
Cuz maybe that is the only way my pain will say good-bye.

Mirror, mirror, who is that i see?
Who is that standing next to me?
You know who is standing by your side.
There is no reason no more to hide.

What they did to you caused more than sighs.
What they forced you to do caused more than cries.
As a child, to stay alive, your brain was split.
But untouched will forever be your spirit.

Mirror, mirror, now I finally know.
I am loved much, that is so.
I have soared and can again.
Cuz the enemy will never win.

Mirror, mirror, now I finally see.
A reflection that is truly me.
Radiating from within so bright.
A beautiful, Glorious light.





ty for listening




ann

[dema]

Honey, you amaze me with your ability to survive. I hope you can find things to keep your mind busy. Do you do puzzles? Do you sketch? Resist the devil and he will flee from you. You know me. You know I talk about not running away and dealing with things. But there is balance. And balance is so hard. Please, try to fill your mind with other things most of the time. Sometimes you have to deal with the pain. But sometimes just doing something, anything to keep your mind away from the pain is best. And of course pray and be with Jesus.

Sudoku? Crosswords? Spider? Learning Spanish? There is Duolingo. Anything that will take you away from that place and not be bad in itself.

Hugs honey.

[Ann_is_Alive]

aww ty dema,

it's sad that so many have those words inside of them as well.

and i play scrabble online. i love it!

luv ya sis!

GBU




ann

[Truesovereigncrown]

What doesn't kill us can only make us stronger Sis.
you have my love and respect.
God bless you my friend

[Ann_is_Alive]

Amen to that true.

ty so much

luv ya bro

GBU




ann

[deetu]

I like it so much better with the ending because it is true
(((hugs)))

[Ann_is_Alive]

yes it is

ty dee





ann